http://dir.salon.com/story/mwt/feature/2002/03/20/stillborn/index.html
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Memories
If we could have a lifetime wish,
A dream that would come true.
We'd pray and hope with all our hearts,
For yesterday and you.
A thousand words can’t bring you back,
We know because we tried.
Neither will a thousand tears,
We know because we've cried.
You left behind our broken hearts,
And happy memories too.
But we never wanted memories
We only wanted you.
(unknown)
2 comments:
Cam,
I am speechless and in tears from this article. I fell like this woman reached into the furthest depths of my soul and wrote down every feeling and emotion that I've ever felt regarding Jacob. Just this morning, we were at breakfast and a couple sitting next to us asked us if Talia was our only child. I said, no, that she was our second. When she asked how old our first was, I hesitated and said that he was 2 1/2. I do that from time to time for this reason exactly. I don't want to be the burden of the light-hearted conversation... but, I also don't want to deny Jacob or the extreme effect that he's had on my life. I am defined by being both Jacob and Talia's mother... eventhough only one of them is here. And, sometimes, letting people believe that he is alive is the only way of achieving both of those feelings.
I saved this article. Thank you so much for sharing it. It's really one of the most honest and truthful portrayals of the array of emotions that we feel after the loss of our children. We are mothers. We want to be "considered" a part of the club by others. Yet, most of them don't, because in their eyes, we only have the "fat" to show for it. In reality though, the love, pride, and joy that our children are still able to give us in their absence are exactly what makes us their parents.
XOXO,
S
I have to add that it's the other peoples' losses to not be able to see either the beauty in or validity of the special motherhood that we have with our children.
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